Friday, December 6, 2013

Advent Journeying

Last Advent, I was neither Confirmed nor permitted to receive the Eucharist. It was a season of longing for me. Then Christmas came, and it was so very painful to not be able to receive Him still. My Advent continued for months, and attending Mass was extremely difficult. But I continued, knowing that I pleased Our Lord by simply going and bearing the pain, especially because I didn't like being there.

Eventually the pain dimmed, and then I was finally able to receive the Eucharist on Easter. It was a joyous night, but I knew in my heart that the time of waiting was not over. I would not be at rest until I was able to enter a convent. My Advent would continue.

But I think it is more than that. Advent is a journey towards God, but we will never fully get there in this life. We will always be longing for more, only fully satisfied when we are able to be with Him in Paradise.

So all of our Advents continue. They continue all of our lives. It would not be right otherwise, for we have not yet reached what our race was made for. We still have miles, years, months, and days to run before we get there. Let us fan the flame of our Advent longing, not hope that it goes away. It is good to desire God's love.

Sunday, November 10, 2013


(I thought I'd actually post for once. It's something of a random post, but it's here for the first time in months.)

Littleness. This was something that my favorite saints longed for.

Saint Francis? He is nicknamed the "Poverello", which is Italian for "little poor man".

Saint Therese? The Little Flower.

Saint Clare? To quote Mother Mary Francis*: "We see our Mother Saint Clare also becoming less and less in her own estimation. At the beginning of her religious life, Saint Clare knew she was the plant nurtured by Saint Francis, the 'planta Fracisci.' But then she lived on a while, and she called herself the 'little plant': 'plantula.'And then sat the very end of her life, she apparently coined a word--at least it cannot be found in any Latin dictionary: 'plantuncula.' It was as if she couldn't be humble enough. She had to go from 'planta' to 'plantula' to 'plantuncula,' a very little plant. At the height of her sanctity, she saw herself as a 'plantuncula.'"

Saint Colette? She wanted to fade into the shadow of Saint Francis and Saint Clare.

Our Lady? To quote Mother Francis* again: "We see Our Lady making less and less of herself all through her life. We might think that she could not make any less of herself than she did at the Annunciation, when she said, "I am the little handmaid of the Lord." This was her ambition. And yet, she seemed to become less and less in her own eyes until at the end, she was simply a silent presence there under the Cross, but a presence so vibrant in her humility that the high priests, the vicious rabble, did not question her presence there. Not one of them tried to usurp the dignity of her humble presence beneath the Cross. That is quite remarkable. They did everything else, but not one challenged her presence or sought to remove her."

I don't think that there were any saints who didn't want to be little. That's the mystery Jesus taught us when he said that "the first shall be last and the last shall be first."

*The quotes are taken from Following the Footprint, by Mother Mary Francis, PCC, a small pamphlet published (copyright 2013) by the Poor Clare nuns in Roswell, New Mexico. (

Sunday, April 21, 2013

Help raise funds so a woman can enter religious life!

The blogger over at myheartmyall (linked to in the sidebar) wants to enter the Marian Sisters of Santa Rosa, but needs to pay off her debt to do that. She is making rosary bracelets and selling them to raise funds. (The bracelet she has in her picture is, by the way, the one that she made for me.)
My rosary bracelet
Her post where she talks about the bracelets is here:

So, if you have anything spare to give, go over and give her some help, whether or not you want a bracelet from her!

And, whether or not you have anything to give, pray for her. She doesn't have any work at the moment, so she could really use all the prayers she can get.

Saturday, April 13, 2013


Yes, I am very well aware that I am late. But it is Easter, and I am getting rather tired of seeing a post that was very appropriate for Good Friday (and a lot of purple for Lent) every time I open the internet. So, I decided I would actually post. And change the format of the blog.

Happy Easter! Christ is risen!

I was confirmed at the Easter Vigil, and have been just growing this last bit. Hence the lack of blogging. Well, that, plus the fact that I don't really blog very often anyway, plus the fact that I am a college student.

So, that said, here's a picture that is more appropriate for the season:

Thursday, March 28, 2013

Behold the Lamb of God

See, my servant shall prosper,
he shall be raised high and greatly exalted.
Even as many were amazed at him—
so marred was his look beyond human semblance
and his appearance beyond that of the sons of man—
so shall he startle many nations,
because of him kings shall stand speechless;
for those who have not been told shall see,
those who have not heard shall ponder it.

Who would believe what we have heard?
To whom has the arm of the LORD been revealed?
He grew up like a sapling before him,
like a shoot from the parched earth;
there was in him no stately bearing to make us look at him,
nor appearance that would attract us to him.
He was spurned and avoided by people,
a man of suffering, accustomed to infirmity,
one of those from whom people hide their faces,
spurned, and we held him in no esteem.

Yet it was our infirmities that he bore,
our sufferings that he endured,
while we thought of him as stricken,
as one smitten by God and afflicted.
But he was pierced for our offenses,
crushed for our sins;
upon him was the chastisement that makes us whole,
by his stripes we were healed.
We had all gone astray like sheep,
each following his own way;
but the LORD laid upon him
the guilt of us all.

Though he was harshly treated, he submitted
and opened not his mouth;
like a lamb led to the slaughter
or a sheep before the shearers,
he was silent and opened not his mouth.
Oppressed and condemned, he was taken away,
and who would have thought any more of his destiny?
When he was cut off from the land of the living,
and smitten for the sin of his people,
a grave was assigned him among the wicked
and a burial place with evildoers,
though he had done no wrong
nor spoken any falsehood.
But the LORD was pleased
to crush him in infirmity.

If he gives his life as an offering for sin,
he shall see his descendants in a long life,
and the will of the LORD shall be accomplished through him.

Because of his affliction
he shall see the light in fullness of days;
through his suffering, my servant shall justify many,
and their guilt he shall bear.
Therefore I will give him his portion among the great,
and he shall divide the spoils with the mighty,
because he surrendered himself to death
and was counted among the wicked;
and he shall take away the sins of many,
and win pardon for their offenses.

(Isaiah 52:13-53:12)

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Habemus Papam!

By now you must know that we have a new pope, Pope Francis I. Previously Cardinal Jorge Mario Bergoglio of Buenos Aires (where my mom lived for about 20 years when she was young), he studied chemistry (like I used to be doing, for a little bit more than a year) and graduated as a chemical engineer before discerning that his vocation was to the priesthood.

I got this picture from taking a screen clipping of the youtube video without translation by Rome Reports here.

A really good article, which is also short, can be found here: My brother sent it to me, saying that I should read it, and it was quite beautiful.

Ad multos annos, Sancte Pater! (I'm only pretending to know Latin, so corrections would be heeded gratefully. Actually, that's probably the case even if I think I really do know something.)

God bless Pope Francis!

Tuesday, March 5, 2013


I long to go. It is through the sacrament of Reconciliation that we are reconciled to God and to His Church. It is though this great sacrament that we are given the grace to grow in Him. I have been told that I must wait a couple of weeks, and I will do so in humble obedience. But I long to go as soon as I may, and I commend this great sacrament to anyone who has recourse to it and is in need of God's mercy. I could go on, but will leave this post here as a short, simple, exhortation to this great sacrament.
The process of conversion and repentance was described by Jesus in the parable of the prodigal son, the center of which is the merciful father:37 The fascination of illusory freedom, the abandonment of the father's house; the extreme misery in which the son finds himself after squandering his fortune; his deep humiliation at finding himself obliged to feed swine, and still worse, at wanting to feed on the husks the pigs ate; his reflection on all he has lost; his repentance and decision to declare himself guilty before his father; the journey back; the father's generous welcome; the father's joy - all these are characteristic of the process of conversion. the beautiful robe, the ring, and the festive banquet are symbols of that new life - pure worthy, and joyful - of anyone who returns to God and to the bosom of his family, which is the Church. Only the heart of Christ Who knows the depths of his Father's love could reveal to us the abyss of his mercy in so simple and beautiful a way. (Catechism of the Catholic Church, 1439)